


Walking In Circles

by marileal



Category: SKAM (Norway), SKAM (TV) RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Best Friends, Childhood Friends, Even is really really really sweet, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, I might attempt to write smut but idk yet, M/M, Mostly Fluff, even is not bipolar in this one, they love each other so much it hurts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-07-03
Packaged: 2019-04-18 17:01:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 19,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14217675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marileal/pseuds/marileal
Summary: "I don’t think I will ever be able to forget this day. The day I realized I have feelings for my childhood best friend. Why am I such cliché? Isak Valtersen, the gay kid who is in love with his straight friend."AKA: Another childhood friends AU.





	1. And So It Begins

**Author's Note:**

> yep, i wrote another evak fanfic. what can i say it's stronger than me.  
> i hope you enjoy it. i plan on updating it at least once a week.  
> have fun :)

I don’t think I will ever be able to forget this day. The day I realized I have feelings for my childhood best friend. Why am I such cliché? Isak Valtersen, the gay kid who is in love with his straight friend. Life can be such a bummer sometimes. And to think that I had a good feeling about this day, how naive of me.

When I woke up this morning I had no idea that I would want to cry and scream and cry a bit more by the end of the evening. At least I aced my biology test, so there’s that going on for me.

Everything started to go to shit when I decided to invite Even to come to my house after school.

“Yeah, I actually need to tell you something later” he said with that stupidly beautiful grin on his face.

I narrowed my eyes and stared at him.

“You know I hate when you do this. Just tell me already”

Even laughed, placed one arm on my shoulders and started to drag me to my next classroom.

“And you know I love making you curious” he replied still grinning.

I rolled my eyes and got off his embrace.

“Ugh you’re so annoying. I don’t know why I’m friends with you to be honest”

We stopped in front of the algebra classroom, which was my next class.

“You’re so grumpy, I love it” he smiled.

I rolled my eyes one more time and got in my classroom.

“See yah Valtersen!”

* * *

 

 

And that’s how the day started to go bad. I didn’t know that at the time, of course. I was super curious about what Even had to tell me but I had no idea that his news would trigger a big ass crises inside me. We don’t hide things from each other so it couldn’t be anything major anyway.

Even met me at the bus stop after school. He was wearing a jean jacket and a blue beanie that made his eyes look even prettier.

Now that I think about it, I should’ve realized it sooner. I don’t think guys stare at each others’ eyes when there are no feelings involved, even if one of you happens to be gay.

We got to the apartment and there was no sign of Noora. Which meant that we could play video games at the TV room with no interruptions, which is always nice.

I decided to bring it up when we started to play FIFA.

“So what do you wanna tell me?” I asked, pretending I wasn’t curious.

“Oh right! So, you know Sonja?”

I thought about it for a few seconds.

“The one who moved to Bakka on freshman year?”

He looked at me with a smile on his face.

“Yeah, we’ve been going out for a few weeks now and I -

I stopped listening after that. I felt my heart beating faster. The sound of Even’s team easily scoring twice brought me back to reality. I looked up so I could face him. He seemed worried.

“You’ve been going out for weeks and you didn’t even think about telling me?” I asked, sounding angry.

“Oh I-I didn’t think it was going to be a big deal… I’m sorry”

Even sounded genuine but that just made everything worse for some reason. I didn’t really understand why I was so angry.

“No I mean it’s fine I guess. But If I was dating a guy for almost a month and you had no idea I bet you would flip your shit Even!”

Which was absolutely true and Even knew it. He broke eye contact and looked down at his lap.

“You’re right. I’m sorry... I should’ve told you sooner, alright? I just didn’t think it was gonna turn out to be anything but then we started going on more dates and I never knew the right time to tell you”

I stared at the TV while he was talking. A funny feeling started to present itself on my stomach.

“Did you not tell me before because I’m gay? You told me this wouldn’t change anything between us! Just because I don’t like girls doesn't mean I don’t wanna know when my best friend is dating one!”

I asked raising my voice. Even looked at me with an incredulous look on his face.

“What the fuck? Of course not! Don’t be stupid Isak, you know that’s not it. I don’t know why I didn’t tell you before alright? I’m sorry, I shouldn't have done that”

He looked sad, which broke my heart, but I was still pretty angry.

Right before I could say anything else, I heard the doorknob starting to move. Even and I stared at the door. Noora walked in with lots of grocery bags.

“ISAK! Come hel- oh you’re right there. Great, can you help me please?”

She asked, trying to get all the bags inside the apartment. My eyes met Even’s, I could tell that we both wanted to finish the conversation we just started, but we knew it would have to wait. I got up to help my roommate and he followed me.

Once everything was in the kitchen, Noora followed us back to the TV room.

“So, how was everyone’s day? You can go back to playing your silly game, I’ll just be on my laptop.”

She sat on the bean bag chair next to the couch. I looked at Even again, who seemed even more sad than before.

“Actually I think I’m gonna get going. Lots of homework.”

He replied, getting up from the couch, grabbing his backpack on the floor and walking towards the door.

“Oh ok.” Noora sounded a bit confused.

Even looked at me once more, saying “I’m really sorry” with his eyes and left.

I stared at the door. At the time, I didn’t understand why I reacted so badly. The moment Even walked out of the apartment I wanted to run after him and apologize. What the hell was I thinking? I mean, I was still mad at the fact the he was going out with this Sonja girl for weeks and never told me about it, but I can’t just yell at him like that. We never yell at each other.

“So… What was that all about? Did you have a fight?”

Noora asked, staring at the door, then placing her eyes on me. I grabbed a pillow that was next to me on the couch, placed it on my face and screamed. Waves of anger and sadness hit me as soon as Even left. I didn’t really understand why I was so upset. Even was right, it wasn’t that big of a deal.

“Isak! What happened?! Are you alright?”

She quickly sat next to me on the couch and placed a hand on my shoulder. I put down the pillow and stared at the ceiling.

“What happened hon?” Noora asked again.

I lowered my gaze to meet hers.

“I think I overreacted about something that he said” I responded honestly.

“And what would that be?” She asked curiously petting my shoulder.

I looked away, avoiding eye contact.

“Even just told me he’s been seeing a girl for a few weeks and I just freaked out on him” I replied quietly.

As soon as I said that sentence the funny feeling in stomach came back. Why did I care so much?

“We tell each other everything. I just, I don’t know… I didn’t like that the he hid that from me. But honestly I don’t even know why I freaked out so much.”

Noora narrowed her eyes and looked at me as if she knew something I didn’t.

“What?” I frowned my eyebrows.

She laughed.

“Oh Isak. You really don’t know why you freaked out?”

What the hell was she talking about.

“Um, no. That’s why I just said ‘I don’t know why I freaked out’ Noora.”

I started to get annoyed.

“Isak Valtersen! You like him! You like like him!” She said while grabbing my shoulders.

That’s when I knew that Noora Sætre was completely crazy. Me liking Even? That was just absurd! We’ve been friends since kindergarten, of course I didn’t have feelings for Even fucking Bech Næsheim. I stared at her for at least five seconds with my eyes wide open.

“Ha-ha Noora that’s very funny” I rolled my eyes and pushed her away.

“Isak I’m not joking! Think about it, he just told you he’s dating someone and you freaked out. You’re jealous!”

I didn’t know what to say to that. That couldn’t possibly be true, could it? The funny feeling at the pit of my stomach came back once I heard her say “Even” and “dating” on the same sentence. I made a funny face and avoided her eyes.

“I want you to close your eyes and imagine dear, handsome Even making out with a random girl he just met a few weeks ago. Does that bother you at all?”

I wanted to throw up. That was a terrible thing to imagine. It made me sad and angry and I just wanted to run away. But that meant…. No, this can’t be happening to me. I stared at Noora for a few seconds. She looked a bit sad for me. I grabbed the pillow once again and screamed some more.

“Get it all out hon” she put her hand back on my shoulder.

I placed the pillow on the couch and lowered my gaze. I wanted to cry.

“What am I suppose to do Noora? I can’t have feelings for my best friend! That’s pathetic!” I brought my hands to my face.

“I’m afraid we don’t get to choose those kinds of things.”

“Well, I’m gonna have to get over it. I don’t wanna ruin our friendship or the relationship he just started with this girl” I made a weird face again when the last bit of that sentence came out.

All I wanted to do was run to Even’s house and apologize for reacting so badly. But now that I was aware of my feelings for him, would I be able to be genuinely happy for his new relationship? I had no idea.

“Look, here’s what we’re gonna do. You’re gonna take a hot shower and let all of that sink in, alright? Then I’m gonna drive you to Even’s house so you can fix this mess” Noora stated squeezing my shoulder.

“Thank you” I replied genuinely.

I got up from the couch trying to make the the lump on my throat dissipate. How did I not notice this before? Noora made it all look so obvious.

I walked to my room and just laid on the bed for a few minutes. I felt a few tears rolling down my face. I couldn’t believe I didn’t see what was right in front of me for a long time. I felt so stupid. Now that I was thinking about it, I did always look for Even’s characteristics in the two guys I’ve ever dated. I also promptly changed the subject if Even ever talked to me about girls. Gosh, I’m so dumb.

I gotta admit, we would be a pretty awesome couple. Even completes me in all the right places. And... oh gosh I need to stop. I can’t think like this, I don’t wanna suffer more than I need to.

When I was done feeling sorry for myself, which took a little over twenty minutes, I got up from my bed, grabbed a towel from the closet and walked to the bathroom. Noora was still at the TV room watching a cooking show.

In the shower, I tried and failed, to not think about anything. Pictures of Even making out with Sonja kept showing up in my head. It made sick to my stomach again. I fought

back the tears. I have to get used to this, Even is not going to break up with his girlfriend because of me.

When I was done washing, I put a black hoodie and a pink snapback on and I walked up to Noora. She looked at me with sad eyes. I made a gesture with my hands that said “let’s not talk about it”. She didn’t insist.

We drove in silence. When we got in front of Even’s house, she placed a hand on my shoulder.

“It’s going to be alright. Text me if you need a ride back ok?”

I looked at her and smiled. She is such an amazing friend.

“Thank you Noora, I’ll see you in a bit”

I hugged her for a few seconds and left the car. Once I got to the door, I stopped, looked at the sky, took a deep breath and pressed the doorbell.

Even opened the door ten seconds later, it seemed like ten hours. The moment I saw him I felt breathless. I kept asking myself how did I not notice before that I had a huge crush on him. The guy is just the definition of handsome.

He lowered his gaze to meet mine and smiled, he seemed happy to see me, that was something.

“Hey” he said almost in a whisper.

I realized that I haven’t said anything yet. I was too busy staring at his ridiculously handsome face. I cleared my throat.

“Hey. Um… Can we talk? I don’t like how we left off when you left” I said honestly.

His face brightened up. He opened the door all the way so I could get in.

“Of course, I’ve been wanting to text you since I left, but I thought you wouldn’t want to talk to me” he stated sadly.

My heart skipped a bit. I didn’t like being the cause of his sadness.

Even started to walk towards his bedroom. The house seemed to be empty, his parents usually only get home at the end of the day. We both sat on his bed, I was so familiar with this house, I am pretty sure I can walk around it with my eyes closed.

“Look, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you and reacted that way. I’m really sorry” I said looking sad.

I placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it. He smiled at my touch and placed a hand on top of mine. My heart started to beat faster again. I need to control myself. We’ve always been very affectionate with each other, that gesture meant absolutely nothing. He squeezed my hand and responded.

“I’m sorry too. You were right, I wouldn’t like if it was the other way around, you have every right to be upset. I honestly don’t know why I didn’t tell you before. Maybe I was scared you wouldn’t approve her or something.”

Even laughed a little and I had to join.

“Approve? Even I’m not your mom! Besides, you’re the overprotective one in this relationship!”

Which was very true. Even always thought the two boyfriends I had last year, when I came out, weren’t good enough for me.

“That’s because you’re too nice to people! They always wanna take advantage of your kindness. Your last boyfriend kept making you buy him clothes for God’s sake!” he threw his hands up.

That is kind of true actually. I couldn't deny it so I just laughed and he joined me.

“Are we good?” he asked still holding on to my hand.

I looked at him and smiled. Gosh, I don’t know what I would do without this bastard.

“Yes. Now tell me about this Sonja girl please.”

I forced a smile on my face and hoped it looked genuine. I heard him tell me about his dates with Sonja, I laughed and made everything in my power to make him see that I was happy for him.

I got back home at around 21:00 because Even’s parents insisted I stayed over for dinner. Our friendship seemed to be great, which was all I cared about at the moment. But the second I walked in my room and laid on my bed, the lump on my throat and the funny feeling on my stomach were back. I had to face the reality, I have feelings for Even Bech Næsheim and he now has a girlfriend.

* * *

 

And that is how that rollercoaster of a day went. Now I’m just staring at my ceiling trying, and failing, to fall asleep. Even if Even didn’t have a girlfriend, as far as I know he’s straight, so it’s not like it was gonna happen anyway. Right?

Before I could think about it any longer, my phone vibrated on the bedside table. I grabbed it and read the notification.

**@evenb97 just tagged you on a picture.**

I stared at phone for a bit. It was probably a meme or a funny picture of me, that’s usually how Even goes. I unlocked my phone.

[ ](https://ibb.co/hwzS9x)

 

There were butterflies on my stomach for what it felt like the hundredth time that day. My heart skipped a beat. Oh boy, this is going to be hard. Even is the sweetest friend in the whole entire universe. Which was once a nice thing, now it was torture. I stared at the phone for a solid five minutes.

Gosh how I wish this situation was different. I tapped twice on the picture and left a red heart emoji as a comment. As I was getting ready to put my phone away, a text showed up and caught my attention.

**Even <3**

**Wanna join Sonja and I for coffee after school? She’s dying to meet you**

I would love that.

**Cool :)**

I stared at my phone for a few seconds before locking it and putting it away. As I closed my eyes and tried, and failed, to fall asleep, one thing was certain in my head. Tomorrow is going to be a very long day.


	2. Truth or Dare?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I mean, the chapter is called "truth or dare". Y'all know what's up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey i'm back!  
> i hope you guys enjoy this lovely chapter.

It’s been exactly one week since Even told me he’s dating Sonja. One week since I realized I have feelings for him. I can’t say it’s been easy, it’s been pretty awful actually. Not because Sonja is a bitch or anything like that, but because she isn’t.

 She is really, _really,_ nice. It makes everything worse. When Even told me she was excited to meet me, boy, he was not kidding. I could tell this was about to get so much worse the moment I met her.

 We met a few days ago at the coffee shop near Even’s house like we had planned. When I got there, they were already sitting at table close to a big glass window. The first thing I noticed was that he had his arms around her.

 “Oh my God! Isak?” she spotted me first.

 “Yep, that’s me” I forced a smile and approached the table.

 Sonja got up and threw her arms around me. I froze for a second but quickly hugged her back.

 “It’s so nice to actually meet you” she said letting go of me so we could look at each other.

 “It’s nice to meet you too” I lied.

It took one glance at Even to realise that he was nervous. She didn’t seem to notice though. He waved at me and forced a smile. I waved back and took a seat.

I soon realised that I wouldn’t have to talk a lot during that interaction. Sonja was telling me her whole life story, and she seemed to be happy with Even and I just sporadically nodding and agreeing.

Even seemed to relax as the conversation flowed. I gotta admit they made a good couple. Both looked like they just came out of a magazine. She seemed to be really happy and Even didn’t seem so bad either.

I had to fight that terrible feeling in my stomach the whole time I was there. I tried to silence the little voice in my head that kept telling me I would make him a lot happier, but I didn’t succeed. All I could think about was how nice it must be to hold his hand in public like that, or put an arm around him.

Even noticed I was looking at their hands intertwined together. I brought my eyes up and he was staring at me with curiosity all over his face. He then let go of her hand and didn’t attempt to hold it anymore.

I avoided his eye contact and focused on whatever Sonja was saying now.

Later that night I got a text from Even.

 

**Even <3**

**So, what do you think?**

I think lots of things.

Can you be more specific?

**Feisty**

**About Sonja of course**

She seems really nice

**You looked a bit tense**

Just making sure she’s good enough for you :)

**Haha**

**Is there anything else?**

What do you mean?

**Is that the only reason you were tense?**

Um yeah

What else would it be?

**Nothing, nevermind**

**Goodnight :)**

Goodnight Even

 

I don’t know what that was about, but knowing Even, he probably just thought I was jealous because he had a girlfriend and I’m single.

 

* * *

 

When the weekend came things started to get weird. Jonas invited Even and I to go to a party at Mahdi’s house. I said yes. Even agreed as well.

At around 20:30 I left the house and met Jonas at the bus stop near my apartment. He was really excited because Eva was going to be there. They were still not “officially” back together. Don’t ask me why though. Everyone knows those two love each other.

By the time we got there, Mahdi’s house was pretty packed already. Jonas and I headed to the kitchen.

 “Is Even coming?” he asked while opening up a beer.

 “Um, he should be. He’s coming with his girlfriend” I replied grabbing a beer as well.

I couldn’t help making a funny face when the word “girlfriend” came out of my mouth. Jonas noticed.

 “Huh. How are you feeling about that?”

Classic Jonas.

I frowned my eyebrows and looked at him with confusion on my face.

 “What do you mean?”

Before Jonas could answer my question, his eyes got wide open and he was staring at somewhere behind me. A smile showed up on his face. I looked back to check what just made him so happy and saw Eva walk in with Vilde. Jonas put a hand on my shoulder but continued to stare at the door.

 “Um, I’m sorry. I’ll be right back” he said while walking away and leaving me alone in the kitchen.

I knew better than to expect him to actually come back. Not when Eva was standing right there.

I took a deep breath and chugged the beer I was holding. “Might as well have some fun” I whispered to myself.

When a put the bottle down and brought my gaze up, I saw a very unpleasant scene. Even just walked in the house with his arm around Sonja. And to make my life even worse, she put her arms around his neck and started to kiss him.

I looked down at my feet. Ugh.

This was going to be a really long night. There was no way I was gonna survive this sober. I grabbed a vodka bottle that was on the table in front of me and took two shots. That would do it for now.

Five minutes later I felt my face getting warmer and my tongue heavier. I should’ve eaten something before I went there, but now was too late.

Mahdi and Magnus found me not too long after the drinks kicked in.

 “ISAK! You made it!” Mahdi screamed even though he was right next to me.

I could tell they were both already drunk. Magnus started to drag me to the living room, where people were dancing. I didn’t have anything better to do so I followed them.

After ten minutes of laughing at their stupid dance moves and attempting some myself, I felt a hand touch my waist.

 “Hey there” I heard a familiar voice say. His lips were almost touching my ear due to the loud music.

I turned around abruptly. Even was standing really close to me. His hand lightly squeezed my waist for a second and then let go. I looked up to meet his eyes.

Gosh he was beautiful.

 “Hi guys!” Sonja’s voice brought me back to reality.

Even introduced her to the guys. I took a step back. I didn’t think I should be this close to him, not when there’s alcohol involved anyway.

 “Are you drunk?” Even asked, getting closer to me again.

I took another step back. He frowned his eyebrows.

 “What makes you ask that?” I questioned. The words left my mouth slower than they normally would.

Even smiled. I love when he does that. I couldn’t help smiling as well.

 “Well, you were dancing with the boys. You usually don’t do that.”

I felt my face blushing.

 “Oh you saw that” I avoided his eye contact.

He laughed.

Sonja was engaged in a conversation with Magnus. I could feel Even’s gaze on me.

 “What?” I sustained his gaze.

He kept looking at me for what seemed like an eternity. Then smiled and looked down.

 “You’re cute.”

I pushed his shoulder.

 “Even I’ve said this a hundred times. I’m not cute. I’m badass.” I rolled my eyes.

He laughed, and before we could say anything else Jonas walked up to us.

 “The girls are starting to play truth or dare. Do you wanna come?” he announced to everyone.

I saw the excitement on Mahdi’s and Magnus’ faces. They quickly agreed. I frowned my eyebrows.

 “No thanks” I replied.

 “Oh come on, what do you have to lose?” Jonas asked grabbing my arm and dragging me.

 “My dignity!” I shouted so he could hear me.

 “You lost that a long time ago Valtersen, come on. You’re playing” Magnus yelled from somewhere behind me.

I was too tipsy to complain, but not too tipsy to notice that Even and Sonja were coming as well.

Jonas dragged me to one of the bedrooms. A bunch of girls were sitting in a circle on the floor with a bottle in the middle. The game started pretty uneventful. I kept choosing truth whenever the bottle landed on me.

Things came out of hand when Eva came up with a new rule.

 “You can only choose truth 2 times in a role” she shouted so everyone could hear.

I was very tipsy at this point so I didn’t worry about it too much. I should have.

I didn’t really care about what was happening in the game, so I placed one of my elbows on my leg and rested my face on my hand. I closed my eyes and waited for the game to be over.

Mahdi’s voice brought me back to reality.

 “It’s on Isak! Um, he needs to do a dare so, let’s see…” his eyes met mine. He had an evil look on his face.

 “Oh I know! I dare you to kiss Even!”

Mahdi laughed. I felt my face burning. My heart started to beat faster.

 “Ha-ha Mahdi that’s hilarious. I’m not gonna kiss Even!”

Even was sitting right next to me. I heard him chuckle.

 “That’s not how the game works Valtersen!” Mahdi shouted.

Everyone was staring at me now. I hated it. I looked to the side. Even already had his eyes on me. He shrugged his shoulders and smiled.

 “Do you mind?” he asked Sonja, who just laughed and denied.

 “We don’t have all night!” someone who I didn’t recognize yelled.

This was really happening. I was about to kiss Even and the situation couldn’t be worse. I felt my hands starting to shake.

Even got closer to me. I felt his hand lifting up my chin so I could face him. He was smiling, which calmed me down a little more.

“It’s okay. Just look at me and pretend they’re not here.”

He could tell I didn’t like this situation. Even knew me too well. I nodded and  felt his hand on my waist again. His face got closer to mine, he raised his eyebrow and smiled.

Before I could freak out even more, his lips met mine. Even was so gentle. He touched me as if I was about to break. I closed my eyes and placed a hand on his neck. There were goosebumps on his skin. I felt like time had stopped and we were the only people on this earth.

The alcohol in my veins made me careless. I opened up my lips, inviting him to deepen the kiss.  His tongue touched mine and it felt like heaven. I ran my hand through his hair and he moaned. Gosh, what a nice sound.

It ended as fast as it began though. I was about to grab his shirt and pull him closer when Even suddenly let go of me.

This brought me back to reality faster than a gunshot. I touched my lips with my left hand. My eyes were wide open. Even had his back to me. Sonja seemed to be laughing.

 “Well that was hot” I heard Eva say from somewhere around me.

The girls were giggling. I couldn’t believe what had just happened. My whole body got cold and shaking again. I had to get out of there. The alcohol made me a bit dizzy but I managed to get up and leave the room.

I walked outside the house. The chilly breeze felt good on my face. There was a bench on the front yard. I walked up to it and sat down.

After a few minutes of taking deep breaths and trying to let everything sink in, someone sat next to me. I knew who it was before I even looked at him.

 “Hey” Even said.

I brought my gaze up to meet his. He had a frown between his eyebrows.

 “Hey” I replied softly, forcing a smile.

 “You okay?”

I didn’t know what to say to that. _I’m in love with you and you have a girlfriend and we just kissed, but besides that it’s all great._

 “I’m just...I mean, that was a lot” I answered honestly.

He looked sad.

 “Isak I’m sorry, that was stupid. I should’ve said no or something.”

What? He thought it was his fault?

 “Even it’s alright. We’re grownups. I’m sure I’ll get over the fact that we kissed” I kept the fake smile on my face.

He chuckled and looked at his lap.

 “I would say ‘just don’t fall in love with me’ but you’re straight so I don’t think we need to worry about that” I added with a laugh.

Even looked confused.

 “What? Who told you I’m straight?” he seemed offended.

What the hell was he talking about?

 “What do you mean? No one told me but-”

 “So you just assumed I’m straight? I’ll let you know that I’m bi, thank you very much”

 Even chuckled. I didn’t even know how to react. I opened and closed my mouth three times before I managed to form a sentence.

 “What the fuck? And you never thought about telling me?!” I was actually offended.

Even laughed and placed a hand on my leg. My body got warm all over.

 “Isak I talk about cute boys with you! What are you talking about?” he shot his eyebrows up and sustained my gaze.

He wasn’t lying. We did talk about cute boys. But I always just assumed it was because I’m gay and he wanted me to be able to talk about those sorts of things with him.

 “Still! That’s something you need to tell me Even!” I pushed his shoulder.

 “Well I’m sorry. Let’s start over then.”

Even then got up from the bench, took a few steps away and then sat back down.

 “Hey Isak, I need to tell you something. I’m bisexual.”

He couldn’t keep himself from laughing, and I couldn’t stop myself from joining.

 “Oh my gosh you’re the worst!”

We just sat there laughing for a few minutes. I didn’t even know what to think. That meant that there was an actual possibility that Even could one day like me. I shouldn’t hold on to that thought though, Even looked like a model. He probably wants to date people who are equally as good looking. I don’t think I fit the criteria.

It was going to be hard to get over that kiss though.

About ten minutes later we decided to go back inside. Things didn’t seem to be weird or awkward between us and I was very thankful for that. But even though things were fine, there was still a lot to process from this night.

I hanged with the boys for another hour or so, then found an excuse to leave. I walked to a bus stop a few blocks away from Mahdi’s house and headed back to the apartment.

Noora was already asleep when I got home, which is not surprising. I got in my room, took off my shoes and pants. Then threw myself on the bed.

Gosh there was so much to sink in.

I decided to try to distract myself by going on social media. What I found on Instagram didn’t make me happy.

 

[ ](https://ibb.co/b2Pr9x)

Looking at it was like getting punched on the stomach. Reality just slapped me on the face. Even though Even just kissed me tonight and he just came out as bisexual, Sonja was still in his life. And apparently they had a lovely night together.

 

* * *

 

So that’s how my weekend went. This all happened on Friday. I’m still not over all that’s happened.

On Monday I decided to share some news with Even. I was sitting at the cafeteria, he was in front of me.

 “So, I gotta tell you something” I poked his arm to get his attention.

He brought his gaze up from his phone and met mine.

 “What’s up?” he smiled.

I didn’t know how he was gonna deal with this so I just said it.

 “I met a guy on tinder and we’re going on a date on Wednesday” I spoke really fast in an attempt to get it over with.

I can’t say Even’s reaction surprised me. His eyes were wide open.

 “You’re joking right?” he shot his eyebrows up.

I laughed, trying to lighten the mood.

 “No Even, I actually have a date” I rolled my eyes.

He put his phone down and stared at me.

 “You know that’s not it Isak. You’re not going on date with someone you met online!”

I gotta admit, I knew he was gonna do this.

 “Yes I am Even” I stated firmly.

He shook his head and avoided my gaze.

 “That’s very irresponsible of you” he looked serious.

 “Well, I’m irresponsible.”

 Even rolled his eyes and stood up.

 “This is not a joke Isak. This is your safety. If you do this, I don’t wanna talk to you anymore” he had anger all over his face.

I rolled my eyes one more time.

 “Oh come on Even. You’re being ridiculous.”

 He stared at me for a few seconds with daring eyes.

 “Nope, I’m not talking to you anymore” he said as he walked away from my table.

 

* * *

 

And that’s how Even Bech Næsheim stopped talking to me. I know it’s not gonna last. It never does. We’ve been through worst fights. It’s been 48 hours since we last spoke.

I am now on my way to meeting Jake. Also known as, the guy I met on tinder. I gotta say I’m a bit anxious but I think it will end up okay.

My phone vibrated in my pocket distracting me for a moment, while I was getting out of the bus. I picked it up to check on it.

 

**Even <3**

 

**Please let me know how the date goes**

**Text me if you need anything**

**And be careful for god’s sake Isak**

 

Thank you <3

 

I couldn’t help but stare at my phone for a whole minute and smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaand that's it for today.  
> thank you so much for the kudos and comments on the first chapter.  
> hope you guys continue to enjoy this story.  
> as always, please leave a comment if you like this chapter at all.  
> i'll be back soon :)


	3. Genghis Khan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Even asks you to listen to a song, you should pay attention to the lyrics.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one is pretty angsty, sorry about that.  
> hope you enjoy it anyway though!

When I got home from my date on Wednesday, I deeply regretted not listening to Even before. That was just a disaster. But, in my defense, not all of it was terrible. The date itself was pretty nice. Jake was really cute, with his curly hair and green eyes. I can’t say it wasn’t pleasant to look at him. Things started to go south when he invited me to go to his house.

“Sure” I replied with a smile on my face.

It’s been a while since I had a guy in my bed, besides Even of course. When a handsome guy asks me to go to his house, I’m gonna say yes. Now I wish I hadn’t. It would’ve saved me a whole lot of embarrassment.

His apartment was a few blocks away from the coffee shop we met at. As soon as we got there, he started to kiss me. And I mean _kiss me._ He pressed me against the wall next to the door. I gotta admit, I was enjoying it.

I grabbed his shirt and pulled him closer. He started to leave a trail of kisses on my neck. A moan escaped my throat. Jake seemed to like that. He smiled and went back to kissing my lips.

He placed one of his thighs between my legs, applying pressure at all the right places. I pulled his shirt up and let my hands travel through his torso.

“Do you wanna go to your room?” I asked in between kisses.

Jake smiled and stared at a corridor to the right of where we were standing.

“Yes please. Just give me a few minutes. My room is a complete mess right now.”

I laughed and nodded. I knew all about having messy rooms. He chuckled and walked towards his bedroom. That’s when I started to feel weird.

Out of nowhere, I got this overwhelming feeling that I shouldn’t be there. I shouldn’t be kissing him when I didn’t even like him. Hell, I didn’t even _know_ him!

My body started to get cold, my head was aching, my pulse was faster, and everything around me was spinning. I knew I was about to have a panic attack. I used to get them a lot when I was younger.

I looked down at my shaking hands. My breathing was irregular and faster. I stared at the door next to me. I took a step towards it and was about to grab the silver doorknob when I heard Jake’s footsteps coming in my direction.

I didn’t know what to do. His smile quickly dissipated when his gaze met mine.

“Are you okay?” he sounded worried.

He tried to put a hand on my shoulder but I took a step back.

“I-I just… I’m sorry, I’m not feeling very good” I avoided his eyes.

I turned the doorknob and opened the door. Jake looked confused.

“Was I going too fast? We don’t hav-”

“No, no, no, it’s not that. I’m sorry, I really need to go.”

I shook my head in denial and left the apartment. He didn’t even have time to reply, but it was better that way.

Tears came streaming down my face when I was sprinting down the stairs to the first floor. I didn’t even know why I was crying. Suddenly all of my fears and anxieties hit me like a train.

Whenever I had a panic attack, I would always call Even. Since the first time it happened when we were both 12. Now wouldn’t be different.

I started to walk without a destination in mind, I just needed to get out of there. I stopped two blocks away from Jake’s building when I saw a bench. Then dialed Even’s number, praying that he wasn’t busy. The phone ring twice before he picked up.

“ _Hey, what’s up?”_ his voice immediately made me feel calmer.

I couldn’t answer right away. All I could think of was how much I was thankful for having Even in my life, and how sad I was that he didn’t like me the way I wish he did.

“ _Isak? You there?”_ he sounded confused.

“C-Can you come…” I struggled to finished the sentence through the tears. I took a deep breath. “Can you come pick me up?” I managed to say.

 _“Isak what’s wrong? Are you okay? Are you hurt? Where are you?”_ he spoke really fast.

I looked up at the sky. “I’m fine I just...just come get me, okay? I’ll text you the address.”

Then I hang up. I knew he would make me talk to him the whole way there and I just couldn’t handle that right now. I texted him the address and patiently waited for him to show up.

My mind was still a mess, my body was still shaking. I didn’t know what triggered this. I never felt this way with my previous boyfriends. But again, I’ve never gone out with people I met online before. Maybe that just wasn’t for me. Specially when I have feelings for someone else.

Why do I have to be this stupid cliché? Havings feelings for your best friend? Really Isak? Couldn’t you be more pathetic? Ugh.

Tears tried to escape my eyes again when I saw a black Corolla show up on the corner of the street. Even rolled down the window.

“Did you order an Uber?” he smiled.

That was the most beautiful smile in the world, and just what I needed right now. I couldn't make myself smile back.

“You didn’t have to get your mom’s car” my voice was rusky.

I got in the car and closed the door. He looked worried.

“Did he do anything to you?! Isak I swear to God, if-”

“No! I already said I’m fine, I just don’t feel good. Just drive please.”

Even ran his eyes all over me, making sure I was all there. I’ve never seen him look so worried. He seemed reluctant.

“Please Even” I begged with tears in my eyes.

He sustained my gaze for a few seconds, nodded, lightly squeezed my knee, then started driving.

First, I thought he was gonna take us to my apartment, but after a few minutes I realised we were going to the park. That’s where I like to go when I’m not feeling good. He parked the car and didn’t say anything for a whole minute.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” his voice was merely a whisper.

I looked up to meet his eyes. He looked so worried, it made me even more sad.

“Nothing happened, I swear. I’m just freaking out, I don’t know why.” I took him out of his misery.

His face relaxed but still had sadness all over it. I couldn’t stop a sob from coming out of my throat. That seemed to have been the last straw for Even. He placed his arms around my waist and held me so, so tight.

The hug triggered the rest of the tears to come out. I cried because I’m in love with him. Because he isn’t in love with me. Because he is the best friend anyone could ever ask for. And because of everything in between.

I don’t know how long we stayed like this. My pulse was now normalizing and the shaking was a lot better as well. Even had such a strong effect on me, it was scary sometimes.

We let go of each other. He stared at me with those perfect blue eyes, then grabbed my face with his left hand and cleaned my tears. I couldn’t help closing my eyes. His touch was so gentle.

When I opened them again, Even looked confused. He had a slight frown between his eyebrows. His hand was now cupping my cheek. His gaze traveled through my face and stopped on my lips. I wanted to kiss him so bad it hurt. In a crazy act of courage, I began to lean in closer to his face.

Before I could do something that I would deeply regret later, his phone began to ring. The sound made us jump away from each other. Gosh, I hope he doesn’t realise what I was about to do. He grabbed the phone and silenced it, ignoring whoever was calling.

He then cleared his throat. “Do you wanna walk around for a bit?”

I was staring at the window, avoiding his eyes.

“Yeah, that would be nice” I replied, getting out of the car.

We walked around the park for about an hour. He kept making stupid jokes just to make me smile. It worked every time. Even never said anything about our almost kiss. He probably didn’t even notice. Which I was very thankful for.

He knew how to take care of me, and I knew how to take care of him. It had always been this way. We know how to lift each other up, and this time wasn’t different. One hour at the park with Even and most of my anxieties were gone. For now at least.

 

* * *

 

After the panic attack, Even decided to be the most caring person in the whole entire universe. He would text me at least once a day for almost a week, just to ask how I was feeling. Noora was also a lot more invested in my life. I knew Even probably told her to keep an eye on me.

Thankfully, I was feeling pretty normal. No signs of panic attacks on the way. I was still confused as to why I had one last week, but I’m glad it didn’t happen again.

On the following Monday, something curious happened. I was laying on the couch, with my legs on Noora’s lap, when I got a notification on my phone.

 

**Even <3 **

**Do you know the song Genghis Khan by Miike Snow?**

Um I don’t think  so

Why?

**You should listen to it**

Okay :)

 

I didn’t give it too much thought. We were always recommending new songs to each other. I decided to listen to it when I was alone in my room, at around 19:30. Noora was doing homework and I was bored. The song played from my laptop while I picked some clothes from the floor.

I started to really pay attention to the song when I heard Miike Snow saying:

 

And I don't have the right

To ask where you go at night

But the waves hit my head

To think someone's in your bed

 

My heart started to beat faster. I stared at the laptop screen.

 

I get a little bit Genghis Khan

I don't want you to get it on

With nobody else but me

With nobody else but me

 

Well, that just summarized how I was feeling about Even. Does that mean…? No. It’s probably just a coincidence. Even couldn’t be trying to say something through this song. Could he?

I stormed out of my room and burst into Noora’s. She jumped in her bed, looking at me with big eyes.

“What the hell Isak? Ever heard of knocking?!” She yelled from under her covers.

I didn’t have time to apologize.

“Noora shut up, I need to show you something!” I sat on her bed and got my phone.

I showed her the texts I got from Even. She didn’t seem impressed at first. As soon as she heard the lyrics, she got a huge grin on her face. I stared at her with scared eyes.

“What do you think this means?”  

Her smile got even bigger. “Isak, he’s obviously trying to tell you something.”

My heart skipped a beat.

“That’s what I thought at first, but he has a girlfriend!” I ran my hands through my face.

Noora rolled her eyes.

“I mean, yeah. But I don’t think it’s a coincidence that you went on a date with a guy and a week later Even sends you this.”

I lowered my gaze for a few seconds. Could this really be true? Could Even maybe like me back?

“You should go to his house and see how he reacts” Noora placed a hand on my shoulder.

My eyes got wide open.

“Are you crazy? I can’t just go to his house” I shot my hands up in frustration.

“And why the hell not? You go to his house all the time, it wouldn’t be weird. Just go and see if he’s gonna say something out of the ordinary.”

She wasn’t wrong. It wouldn’t be weird If I just showed up at Even’s house at almost 20:00. It would definitely not be the first time.

“Come on! Get up and go!” Noora yelled.

I jumped at the yelling but decided to comply. What did I have to lose anyway? I ran back to my room, put a blue hoodie on and left the house.

When I got in the bus my heart started to beat even faster. What if he actually liked me. Oh boy, that would be so nice. I would be able to kiss him senseless like I’ve been wanting to for a while.

My heart was about to jump out of my chest when I left the bus and walked to his house. I pressed the doorbell. Even’s mom showed up a few seconds later. The blonde woman smiled when she saw me and told me to just go to Even’s room. I happily obeyed.  I knocked on the door and waited patiently for him to open it.

The huge smile on my face dissipated as soon as I got a glimpse of the inside of his room. Sonja was laying on his bed, under the covers, and she seemed to be shirtless. Ouch.

“Oh…” was all I managed to say.

Even looked embarrassed. His hair and clothes were messy, as if he just put them back on.

“Isak! Um, just….just give me a few minutes. I’ll be right out.” he closed the door.

I didn’t know where to look. My whole face was hot and probably bright red. Even was sleeping with Sonja. He doesn’t have feelings for me. The song was just a coincidence. A thousand thoughts went through my head at the same time, none of them were pleasant.

I started to walk towards the front door. I didn’t wanna be there anymore. This had to be a nightmare. I couldn’t believe I came here thinking Even was gonna say he liked me and found him in bed with fucking Sonja. That was the opposite of what I thought would happen tonight.

It was hard to open the door with my shaking hands. As soon as I managed to do it, the cold breeze hit my face. I stepped outside, closing the door behind me. I heard the door opening again when I was almost a block away.

“ISAK!” I recognized Even’s voice.

I turned around. He looked sad. I put a fake smile on my face.

“It’s nothing! Don’t worry about it, I’ll just text you later!” I lied and continued to walk away. Not giving him time to reply.

 

* * *

 

When I got back home that night, all I could do was cry. Noora had left to go to Vilde’s house, so I didn’t have to worry about explaining what happened for now. I placed my head on my pillow and prayed that this terrible sadness didn’t stay for long.

I was almost asleep when I got a text on my phone.

 

**Even <3**

**We need to talk.**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh wow that was an intense one.  
> don't worry everything will be okay in the end haha.  
> please commen if you like this story at all!  
> i'll be back with an update soon :)


	4. Good Things Don't Last Forever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak and Even go to a party alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys,  
> sorry for the longer wait, I had a bunch of college stuff to do.  
> i hope you enjoy this update!

It’s been three days since Even texted me. Meaning, I have been avoiding him for three days. I know that at some point I’ll have to face him, I just wish I knew what he wants to talk about. I’m terrified that he noticed my odd behaviour the other night when I saw Sonja on his bed. I mean, I did just run out of the house without saying anything. But maybe, _hopefully_ , Even thinks it was because I was embarrassed.

I gotta admit that avoiding Even at school is a very difficult activity. Especially when we usually have lunch together everyday. On Thursday he cornered me as soon as I got in the cafeteria, before I had time to run to Noora’s table.

“Hey Isak” he smiled but it didn’t reach his eyes.

I avoided his gaze.

“Hey”

“Wanna have lunch together today? We haven’t done that all week.”

Even looked sad. It broke my heart. Suddenly a big wave of guilt hit me right on the chest. I’m being unfair to him. He doesn’t deserve to be ignored like this. I mean, it’s not his fault that he doesn’t have feelings for me.

“Sure” I attempted to smile.

We bought our lunches and sat on one of the empty tables. I didn’t want things to be awkward between us so I decided to address the elephant in the room.

“So, what did you want to talk about?”

I brought my gaze up to meet his. Even seemed to have been caught by surprise. He stared at the apple on his hand and his face got bright red. _Hm, that’s new._

“Oh. Um, oh yeah, right um…”

He stumbled over the words. I couldn’t help but smile. Was he nervous?

“I just wanted to… apologize! Yes, apologize.”

“What for?”

I asked and took a bite of my sandwich.

“For Monday of course. Sorry you had to see that.”

My stomach felt funny. I didn’t like thinking about that.

“Oh it’s alright, no worries” I lied.

Even’s gaze was on me now. He placed one of his hands on top of mine and squeezed it for just a second.

“Well, I still feel bad so I’ll make it up to you” he smiled.

My heart started to beat faster.

“And how will you do that?”

I shot my eyebrows up and sustained his gaze.

“Party tomorrow. Just me and you, like old times. What do you say?”

That did sound nice actually. I miss spending alone time with Even. We are best friends after all. I chuckled and nodded.

“Sure, works for me.”

His face brighten up and his smile got wider.

“Great! I’ll text you the address later.”

 

* * *

At around 20:00 on Friday, Even stopped by the apartment. He looked amazing. For some reason his tight jeans and blue long sleeve shirt just made him look mesmerizing to me. He was now laying next to me on the bed, waiting for me to get ready.

“Are you gonna change or…?”

I rolled my eyes but started to sit up.

“Isn’t the party at like 20:30? We have time.”

I hate getting at parties too early. But since Even seemed to be pretty impatient I got up, took off my sweater and started to look for an outfit. I found a pink shirt that went well with the dark jeans I was already wearing and decided to go with it. When I turned around to put my old shirt in the laundry basket I noticed Even’s eyes on me. He didn’t seem to realise I caught him staring. His eyes traveled through my bare chest and went all the way up to my face.

When Even noticed my gaze on him, he looked away and seemed embarrassed. I felt my face getting hotter. Why was he staring at me like that?

“You’re taking too long. I’ll wait for you outside” he got up and left the room.

I stared at the door. _What just happened?_ I tried to ignore whatever was going on with Even and focused on getting ready. After putting the pink shirt and a black beanie on, I left the room. 

By the time we got in the bus, Even seemed to be back to normal. I didn’t know much about this party. The house was pretty crowded when we walked in. I recognized a few faces from school but I didn’t care enough to go say hello. Even seemed to feel the same.

The first half of the party was very uneventful. Things started to get intense when I had the brilliant idea of doing shots with Even.

“Why the hell not?” he shot his eyebrows up and smiled.

We ended up doing three shots of tequila. I was going for a fourth but Even took the bottle away from me.

“I don’t want you throwing up everywhere” he chuckled.

I felt my head getting lighter and my tongue heavier. Even dragged me to the living room where people were dancing. He placed his hands on my waist and started to move to the rhythm of the music. My body got warmer from his touch. I looked up to meet his eyes, he was smiling. I couldn’t help but smile back. This feels nice.

I put my arms around his neck and started to dance with him. We weren’t very good at it but the alcohol made us not care. We laughed and danced, and at that moment, everything was perfect. I looked up again and got hypnotized by his face. H _ow can someone be this beautiful?_ Even had his eyes closed and moved his head from side to side. I felt the urge to touch his face, he was too mesmerizing, I couldn’t keep my hands away.

Before I had the chance do it, a hand poked my shoulder. I turned around abruptly looking for the owner of the hand, and saw the last person I wanted to see. Jake stared back at me with a smile on his face.

“Hi Isak!”

My eyes got wide open. I didn’t know where to look at. God please make him go away.

“Hi” I faked a smile.

Jake took a sip of his drink and placed a hand on my shoulder for just a second.

“It’s so nice to see you! I was actually gonna text you and invite to this party earlier but I didn’t really know if you wanted to see me again after last time…”

He looked sad for a moment. I didn’t really care, the last thing I wanted to do was talk about that night.

“Wanna grab a drink and dance?” he smiled again.

Nope, I don’t. But how the hell was I suppose to say that to him. I opened and closed my mouth three times, thinking of something to say. Before I could manage to reply Even showed up next me. I looked up to meet his eyes, he looked serious. I brought my gaze to Jake once again.

“Um, actually I’m here with Ev-”

“His boyfriend” Even interrupted me.

My heart skipped a beat. _What?_

“Hi I’m Even.”

He introduced himself and offered his right hand. Jake looked shocked. His eyes traveled from me to Even twice before he replied.

“Oh… Um, hi. I’m Jake” he held Even’s hand.

Jake stared at me with confusion all over his face.

“I guess I’m too late then. See you around Isak.”

His eyes looked sad. He turned around and walked away. My heart was beating like crazy. I felt my hands starting to shake. I looked up with a frown between my eyebrows.

“What the hell was that?” I asked.

Even seemed more relaxed since Jake left. He looked down to meet my gaze. His face looked a little scared, as if he didn’t know if I was about to yell at him.

“Oh I just… Y-You seemed like you wanted to get rid of him” he stared at the floor.

A chuckle escaped my throat. Did he think I was mad at him? I was actually very thankful. I held his face with both my hands, making him look at me. A big smile showed up on my face, letting Even know that he had no reason to feel sorry.

“Thank you! I mean, the boyfriend part was a bit much, but I’m ok with it if you are” I laughed.

Even looked very serious. His hands were back on my waist now.

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

My whole body got warm. I was suddenly very aware of how close our bodies were. I stared at his lips. He had an intense look on his face. I wanted to kiss him so, so bad. Before I could even think about getting away. Even’s hands pulled me closer. I looked at his bright blue eyes, searching for the reason of his sudden behaviour.

His lips were on mine before I could say anything, and it felt like heaven once again. I didn’t even realised how much I missed his kiss until now. It was more urgent than the first one. As if he had been waiting a long time to do this. Normally I would pull away and ask what the hell was he doing, but the alcohol in my veins didn’t allow that. I placed my arms around his neck again and kissed him like my life depended on it. Our tongues were tangled together in a beautiful dance.

I don’t know how long we stayed like this. Suddenly I felt a pressure in my pants that wasn’t there a moment ago. Even seemed to notice it as well. He smiled in between kisses.

“Do you wanna go to the bathroom?” he bit his lower lip and stared at me expectantly.

Did he just suggest what I think he did? My head was spinning, there was a lot happening at once.

“Sure” I replied in a whisper.

He grabbed my hand and dragged us to the nearest bathroom. We opened the door and saw a girl smoking a blunt in the bathtub. Thankfully, she looked at us, laughed and got up.

“It’s all yours guys. Have fun” she winked with a suggestive look on her face and left.

I couldn’t help but chuckle at her. As soon as she closed the door. Even pressed me again the nearest wall and started to kiss me again. It felt so surreal. This was really happening. I grabbed and pulled his hair, making him moan. The sound made me get goosebumps down my spine. He pulled my shirt up just enough to get his hand on my torso. My skin burned at his touch. I was living the best night of my life for sure.

His hand traveled through my stomach and stopped on the button of my jeans. My breathing got heavier.

“Even, are you sur-”

He put his left hand on my mouth and smiled.

“Sshh. Just tell me if you want me to stop.”

I nodded. He began to leave a trail of kisses on my neck, then on my chest and stomach. Then he quickly got on his knees and started kiss down my belly button. I looked down, breathing heavily. Even brought his gaze up to meet mine.

“Do you want me to stop?”

I denied with my head. He touched me through my pants and I thought I was gonna come right away. This was already better than all the sex I’ve had in my life so far. Even pulled down my pants and underwear. I felt too exposed for a second. _What if he doesn’t like what he sees?_ He seemed to feel my insecurity.

“You’re beautiful.” He said while looking up.

Then his lips around me. _Oh God, this feels nice_. His warm mouth began to move back and forth, making me moan loudly. I shot my head back and enjoyed everything that was happening. It didn’t take long for me to feel like I was about to finish.

“E-Even I’m going to… You might wanna” I couldn’t finish the sentence.

Truth was I didn’t want him to take his mouth away from there. Fortunately, Even didn’t seem to care at all. He just looked up to meet my eyes and began to move faster until he felt my come in his mouth. He then got up, swallowed it and smiled. I didn’t think I could like him more than I already did. At the moment, I discovered I was wrong.

I couldn’t help but smile back. Even shot his eyebrows up and failed to hold his laugh. I looked at him and joined. I think we were both too shocked by what just happened.

A friend of Noora told me once that when you get a blowjob from someone, it’s only polite to retribute the favor. So I looked at him with mischief in my eyes and placed a hand on his pants. Even smiled and kissed me. The kiss was calm and gentle this time. His tongue gently caressing mine.

“Wanna go dance again?” His lips were almost touching my ear.

“Are you sure? I can-” I tried to offer but got interrupted.

“You can pay me back some other time”

He chuckled and touched my cheek. I smiled and nodded.

My head was spinning. I can’t believe I not only just made out with Even, but also got a blowjob from him! And he said I can pay him back some other time, which means he wants this to happen again. Right?!

I opened the door so we could leave the bathroom. We walked to the living room and danced like it was our last day on earth. But, we all know that good things don’t last forever. At around 1 o’clock, Even got a text. A text that felt like a slap on my face. He grabbed his phone from his pocket and I read the name of someone I completely forgot about. Someone I wish didn’t exist right now. Sonja.

I felt the blood leaving my veins. Oh my gosh, how could I forget about Even’s freaking girlfriend? I shot my gaze up to meet his, he looked as worried as I did.

“Even, please tell me you broke up with Sonja and that’s why we did everything that we did tonight” I frowned my eyebrows.

He looked sad.

“I-I… Isak I’m sorry. I just… I forgot about her if I’m being honest.”

I can’t say I don’t understand the feeling. A few minutes ago I didn’t remember Sonja at all. But he’s her boyfriend for fuck’s sake, he’s the one who’s suppose to remember her.

“Even… You just cheated on your girlfriend” I looked serious.

He looked down at his feet.

“What if I don’t want her to be my girlfriend anymore?” his voice was barely audible.

My heart started to beat faster again.

“What do you want then?”

I avoided his eyes, scared of what he was going to say. He held one of my hands.

“I think you know what I want.”

I felt butterflies in my stomach. I looked up. He was smiling at me.

“Can we just enjoy this night and talk about everything else in the morning?”

I chuckled. That sounded like a great idea actually.

“Yes please”

 

* * *

  
When I woke up the next morning my head was killing me. First I thought I had a crazy dream, but soon the memories began to come back to me. A smile showed up on my face. Even likes me. He actually likes me and he’s going to break up with Sonja to be with me.

I got up, left the room and walked to the kitchen. Noora was sitting at our table, with a bowl of cereal in front of her.

“Noora, I need to tell you something!”

I smiled and messed with her hair. She pushed me away and adjusted the mess I made on her head.

“Must be something good for you to be in a good mood before 12:00”

I rolled my eyes.

“Even and I hooked up last night.”

Oh what a nice thing to say. That was my new favorite sentence. She shot her eyebrows up and dropped her spoon.

“Really?! Oh my God Isak that’s awesome!”

She smiled, placed one of her hands on top of mine on the table, and squeezed it.

“I know! The bad part is that he’s still with Sonja and I hate that he cheated on her but that should be taken care of already.”

She looked less happy.

“Oh that does suck. I hope she’s not too hurt.” Noora seemed sincere.

I also hope she doesn’t get too hurt though. She didn’t do anything to deserve to be cheated on.

Later that afternoon I decided to text Even and see how things were going. For my surprise he didn’t reply all day, but I didn’t give it too much thought. I texted him again on Sunday, but also didn’t get a reply. I tried to stay calm, and kept telling myself he was just busy, that maybe he just forgot his phone somewhere. But deep down, I knew something was up.

I actually started to freak out when I didn’t see him at school on Monday at all.

 

**Even <3**

Even please answer me

Please I just wanna know if you’re ok

I understand if you think what we did was a mistake

Just please talk to me

 

I didn’t get any response for that either. When I got home from school I wanted to cry. What happened? He seemed so certain about us on Friday. Maybe he was just drunk. Ugh. Obviously he was just drunk.

I was laying on my bed with my laptop on my chest when Noora walked in my room.

“Um, did you check Instagram today?”

I looked up at her. She looked worried.

“No, why?”

She sat down on my bed.

“You might want to”

She was starting to worry me. I grabbed my phone and went through my feed. I didn’t find anything out of the ordinary at first but then I saw Even’s latest post.

 

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

 

 

Looking at that picture was like getting punched on the stomach.

“I’m sorry Isak” Noora placed a hand on my shoulder.

What the hell? I felt tears rolling down my face. That’s not fair to me or to Sonja. A wave of anger hit me. I grabbed my phone and decided to text him again.

 

**Even <3**

Fuck you.

You can talk to me again when you make up your fucking mind.

Asshole.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *runs away*  
> sorry about that! things will get better soon i swear!  
> please leave a comment if you enjoy this story at all!  
> i'll be back soon <3


	5. Even

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even is confused and Sonja interferes. A lot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey i'm back!  
> i hope this update helps clear Even's image a little bit. home boy is l o s t. and he's getting help from all the wrong places.  
> not a lot of fluff on this one, sorry about that.  
> i hope you're still able to apreciate it though!  
> have fun :)

_Even’s POV._

_Saturday, 12 hours after the party._

 

I was laying on my bed and staring at the ceiling when my mom opened the door slightly.

“Sonja is here hon.” she smiled.

I suddenly got really, _really_ nervous. Not as nervous as when I was deciding whether or not to kiss Isak, but still, very nervous. I hope she doesn’t completely hate me after this.

“Just tell her to come here, please” I swallowed and forced a smile back.

About five seconds later Sonja showed up at the door. She had a red sweater on and her hair was in a cute ponytail. _Please don’t hate me, please don’t hate me._

“Hey handsome” she leaned over and gave me a peck on the lips.

I made a gesture with my hands, inviting her to sit next to me on the bed.

“So, what do you want to talk about?”

I could feel my heartbeat getting faster, my hands starting to shake. Once I say it, it’s real. I’ll have to face whatever the consequences are.

“I wanna start off by saying I never meant to hurt your feelings” I spit it out.

Sonja frowned her eyebrows. She seemed worried now.

“O-Ok… You’re starting to freak me out. Just say it please.”

I took a deep breath. I can do this.

“So, I have reasons to believe I have feelings for Isak. Very strong feelings, actually. And last night we...we ended up doing some things. And I’m so sorry for acting up on him when I’m still with you.”

I tried to say everything as fast as I could, bringing my gaze towards hers. She looked like she was about to throw up. Her lips opened and closed at least three times before she was able to form a sentence.

“Oh” was all that came out.

I stared at the floor. Ten seconds went by. It was the loudest silence in the world. I braced myself for angry screams, but they never came. Instead she turned to me with a weird smile, looking extremely calm.

“It’s alright. I understand.” She placed a hand on my shoulder. “I’m sorry that he doesn’t like you back though.” She added.

_What?_

It was my turn to frown my eyebrows.

“W-What do you mean? Aren’t you upset? I’m pretty sure I deserve some anger right now.”

Sonja chuckled and squeezed my shoulder once again.

“Well it doesn’t feel nice but, you know, shit happens. But again, I’m sorry the feeling isn’t mutual.”

What the hell did she mean by that? Isak likes me. Right? I mean, I think he likes me.

“How can you know that?” I questioned, scared to know the answer.

She looked at me with pity. I didn’t like that look.

“Oh it’s just little stuff. You can tell he’s not interested in you.” Sonja stated as a matter of factly.

My heart started to beat even faster. I stared at the floor. Sonja is very good at analyzing people, if she thinks Isak doesn’t like me it’s probably true. I felt a lump forming in my throat.

“Well that sucks. I just lost my girlfriend and Isak doesn’t even like me back.”

I laid back down and looked at a picture on my bedside table. It’s a picture of Isak and I at a park when we were younger. I extended my arm to pick it up, when my phone vibrated from somewhere on the bed. I lifted up the blankets and grabbed it.

 

**Isak V. <3**

**Hey, do you wanna come over?**

 

I stared at the text. Sonja looked at me with curiosity.

“Is it Isak?”

I nodded and showed it to her. She made a funny face.

“He probably wants to apologize for leading you on.”

Gosh I don’t want to hear that. I started to type an excuse when Sonja grabbed the phone from my hand abruptly.

“NO! Don’t answer him!”

I looked at her with inquisitive eyes.

“You shouldn’t go…. I mean, unless you don’t mind being rejected.” 

Ouch. That’s the last thing I want. Over the past few days I was so sure I wanted to tell Isak I have feelings for him. I even sent him a song that pretty much told him how I felt. But something always got in the way. The day I sent him the song, Sonja decided to come over to my house and that just became a disaster. The days that followed that event, Isak just decided to ignore me. Then, when he finally asked me what I wanted to talk about, I just froze. I couldn’t make myself say it. Now Sonja assures me that he doesn’t like me back.

She handed me back the phone. I wanted to cry. Why is this happening?  

“You didn’t lose your girlfriend by the way.” She laid down next to me.

I turned to the right so I could face her.

“What? I don’t think you should be with me when I chea-”

“Let’s not make any decisions right now, ok? Just think about it for a few days. Maybe you were just confused about this whole Isak thing.”

I blinked a few times.

“But…” I tried to come up with something.

Sonja gave me a peck on the cheek and smiled.

“Just think about it.”

She got up and left the room.

Well, that just made me even more confused. Gosh, why is this so complicated?! I like Isak, but apparently my feelings are one sided. I was ready to break up with Sonja but now she says she’s willing to let this go and still be with me. Which sounds crazy but, she is an amazing person. Maybe she's just that nice.

* * *

 On Sunday, I spent the whole day with Sonja. She was being extremely nice and super patient with me. I still haven’t responded to Isak's texts. He seems to be getting worried but Sonja thinks I shouldn’t respond yet.

“He’s just gonna come up with excuses and hurt your feelings. The best thing to do is ignore him right now.”

She explained while we were having lunch at a café near my house. I feel like she knows what she’s saying, so I decided to listen to her.

I feel bad for leaving Isak in the dark, but I hope he understands this is what both of us need right now. I don’t want him to feel like I ruined our friendship.

“I need to talk to him at some point Sonja” I told her, making a frustrated gesture with my hands.

“How about this… What if you post a picture of us together? That will show him that you know how’s not interested and you’re ok with it.”

She smiled with a sandwich on her hand. That made sense actually. Then he wouldn’t feel like we need to have a whole talk about what happened. It would make everything easier. But, was I ready to just ignore it all?

“I’ll think about it.” I ended up saying.

She agreed with her head and continued to work on her lunch.

Isak seemed to be getting more and more upset on his texts. I wanted to cry every time my phone got a notification. Sonja insisted that ignoring him was the best thing to do. It was hard, but I listened. I’m glad she’s being so patient with me.

At around 21:00 Sonja finally went home. I think she stayed all day to make sure I’m ok. She also told me to turn off my phone in order to sleep better and not have to worry about the texts. I followed her advice, but I was still as worried as before. Whenever I closed my eyes Isak was there. I wanted to kiss him again, his were softest lips I’ve ever kissed in my life. I really hope I didn’t ruin our friendship. I don’t know what I would do without him.

Two hours of rolling around in bed later, I finally fell asleep. The following morning was terrible. I was so sad I didn’t want to leave my bed. I told my parents I didn’t feel so good and they allowed me to skip school for the day.

At around 12 o’clock Sonja showed up at my door once again.

“Hey handsome, how are you doing?” She smiled from outside the house.

I forced a smile back.

“You don’t have to check on me all the time you know? Aren’t you suppose to be at school?” I shot my eyebrows up.

She chuckled, getting in the house and closing the door behind her.

“You’re not there. I figured I should stop by.”

I started to walk towards my room again.  

“Did you decide anything about the picture yet?” She sat on my bed.

I avoided her gaze. I did decide I was gonna post it but I wasn’t too proud about it. I felt like I was running away from Isak. But again, I don’t wanna ruin our friendship.

“Yeah, I’ll post it.” I sat next to her on the bed.

She smiled.

“It’s the right thing to do Even. Don’t worry, things will go back to normal.”

I grabbed my phone and began to search for a good picture of us. I chose one, but couldn’t figure out the caption. Sonja grabbed the phone from my hands and ended up going for: “So lucky to have you as my girlfriend”. I chuckled when I read it.

“We’re not officially back together. I still don’t think you should be with me.”

I gave her a serious look. She grinned.

“Well, Isak doesn’t know that does he? That will just show him that you know he’s not interested.”

I guess it made sense.

After she made sure I was doing ok, we decided to work on our homework. I had to make myself be at least a little productive today. About an hour after the Instagram post, I got some really angry texts from Isak.

 

**Isak V. <3**

 

**Fuck you.**

**You can talk to me again when you make up your fucking mind.**

**Asshole.**

 

I felt my blood leaving my veins when I finished reading it. _What?_ What does he mean make up my mind? Does he… No, it can’t be. Sonja quickly noticed the change in my mood.

“What?” She asked, getting closer.

I handed her the phone. The lump in my throat was back.

“What do you think he means by make up my mind? Why is he so mad?”

Tears started to well up in my eyes.

“He’s probably just mad about you not responding babe. Don’t get your hopes up. You know he doesn’t like you.”

She squeezed my shoulder. I knew it was true but still hurt to hear it.

“Talk to him tomorrow at school alright?”

I nodded and went back to my books. The sinking feeling didn’t leave my chest that easily. I couldn’t really focus on homework. I felt so guilty for making Isak mad. I’m going to apologize a million times tomorrow.

A couple hours went by. Sonja was packing her books and getting up from the bed. She grabbed her phone and froze for just a second.

“Did you see Isak’s latest post?”

I denied with my head. She extended her arm and showed me the phone.

 

[ ](https://ibb.co/h82ozH)

 

I felt my body getting cold. Isn’t that the guy from the party? Jake? Or whatever his name is. Does that mean they’re together? What does he mean by “so lucky”? Was that a reply to my earlier post?

“See, he got your message. He’s already seeing this new guy.” Sonja interrupted my thoughts.

She smiled and placed a hand on my cheek. I tried to fake a smile.

“It’s going to be ok.” She reassured me.

It certainly didn’t feel like it. She leaned up towards my face and kissed me lightly. I was too frozen and upset to complain. I didn’t kiss her back though, I still don’t think we should be together. Not when I don’t truly want to be with her.

“Text me if you need anything.”

She stopped at the door, gave me another smile, then left the room. I heard the front door opening and closing. When I knew she was gone, I laid back on the bed. I guess that was it then. Isak really didn’t want to be with me.

I grabbed my phone, opened Instagram once again, and stared at Isak’s new picture. It was like getting punched in the stomach. I know I don’t have any right to feel jealous. It’s not his fault he doesn’t like me. Ugh, I hope this terrible sadness goes away soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sooooo, who wants to slap Sonja? i certainly do.  
> not a lot happened on this one, sorry about that. i just felt like it was necessary to show what's going on in Even's head and why he keeps backing off from isak.  
> i'm sorry sonja is so terrible haha  
> next chapter we're going to have some fluff, and they might even communicate!! which is a word that currently doesn't exist in their dictionaries. don't you just want to lock them in a room and make them talk? cause i really do haha  
> anyway, please comment if you like this story at all.  
> i'll be back soon <3  
> ps: this is not really how i imagine jake but that's the only pic i found of tarjei with a boy that isn't henrik.


	6. Jealousy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak and Even get jealous.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey!  
> i'm so sorry for the wait, i didn't plan on taking this long. i just had to deal with a bunch of college stuff for a hot second. Also my family came to visit me in the states and they don't speak a word in english so that was an Adventure™ haha. But anyway, now that I'm off college I should be able to update more often. This chapter is longer than usual so I hope you guys enjoy it.  
> Have fun!

Just looking at Jake made me feel guilty. I feel like the biggest asshole ever. I know I shouldn’t have texted him. He doesn’t deserve to be played with. I just… I was so angry, I didn’t think this through. So, here we are on our second date, and I’m not even counting the disastrous first one. 

He wanted to grab lunch and come to the park. I agreed. Mostly because I already feel really guilty, might as well let him choose what we are going to do. 

We’re sitting at a picnic table with ice cream cones in our hands. I’m trying to find a way to tell him the truth, I swear I am.

“Look, I know you only asked me out to make Even jealous” he smiled and avoided my gaze. 

Well, that was a lot easier than I expected. 

“I just… I hoped you would maybe realize that I’m a lot cooler?” It sounded like a question. 

He chuckled. I looked at my feet. 

“I-I… I’m sorry Jake” 

I didn’t know what else to say. His eyes traveled up to meet mine, they looked sad. 

“Just… Promise me you’ll try to talk to him about whatever happened between you two. You obviously have something special going on, I don’t wanna be in the way.” 

I took a deep breath. I wish it was that simple. 

“How did you know?” 

I curiously asked. Certainly my feelings weren’t _ that  _ obvious. Were they? 

Jake grinned. 

“You’re not that good at hiding things, you know.” He laughed

“What?! I’m great at hiding things!”

I placed a hand on my chest and pretended to be offended. He shot his eyebrows up and continued to laugh. 

“Clearly!” 

I couldn’t help but join him. The sun was hitting his face at just the right places. He looked adorable. Why can’t I just like this boy? Everything would be so much easier. 

“Can we at least be friends?” I tried. 

He turned to me. His smile was now gone. 

“Maybe in the near future. I like you too much right now to settle for just friends.” 

He placed a hand on my shoulder. I grabbed his hand and squeezed it. 

“Gosh! Why do you have to be so handsome?” He smiled but sounded frustrated.

I looked at him with confusion all over my face. He got up quickly and paced to the other side of the table. 

“Are you talking about me?” I genuinely questioned him.

He rolled his eyes and threw his hands up in a frustration gesture.

“Yes Isak, of course I’m talking about you.” 

I continued to look confused. I don’t really consider myself handsome…

“Oh my God. You don’t even know it, do you? Come on, you gotta be aware of the fact that you’re, like, super hot.” 

It was my turn to roll my eyes. 

“Yeah, sure.” 

 

* * *

 

After the park, Jake dropped me off at the apartment. Noora was sitting at the kitchen table when I walked in. 

“How did it go?” 

She asked with her eyes glued to the laptop screen in front of her. 

“He said he knows I asked him out just to make Even jealous.”

I replied, sitting at the chair opposite to hers. That made her bring her eyes up and look at me. 

“I mean, he’s not exactly wrong.” 

I rolled my eyes once again. 

“I know, I know. I just feel bad.”

I looked up, avoiding her gaze. 

“And you should.” 

She stated and went back to typing. 

“Jesus. Thanks Noora.” 

I grabbed my backpack from the floor and began to stand up. 

“What? You know what you did was wrong Isak. I’m not gonna tell you it’s all good just because I’m your friend.” 

I knew she was right. That doesn’t mean it’s easy to hear it though. She was staring at me with a daring look on her face. I turned around, walked all the way to my room, dropped my backpack on the floor and threw myself on the bed.  _ Ugh.  _

My eyes traveled through the bedroom and landed on my bedside table. That damn picture of Even and I seemed to be staring at me. I extended my arm and flipped the picture frame over. 

I haven’t talked to Even all week. I’ve been avoiding him at school and he seems to be avoiding me as well. I miss him like hell. I wish everything could go back to normal. I miss  _ us _ . 

 

* * *

 

Later that afternoon Jonas texted me inviting me to a party at his house. Apparently his parents were going out of town for the weekend. I was desperate for a distraction so I said yes. Also, it’s a Friday. 

At around 19:00 Noora showed up at my door. She had a black short skirt on and a red crop top. 

“Are you coming to Jonas’ party?” 

She asked while looking for something in her purse. 

“Yes, are  _ you _ ?” I shot my eyebrows up. 

“Found it!” She held a red lipstick between her fingers. “Yes Isak I’m going. I go out sometimes, you know.” 

She rolled her eyes and turn around. 

“I’ll wait for you in the TV room. Hurry up!”

Why is she in such a hurry? I didn’t plan on getting ready for another 30 minutes or so, but I guess now I have to. The party is suppose to start at 19:00 but as I’ve said before, I hate getting at parties too early. 

I took a deep breath, got up from the bed and walked towards the bathroom. I turned the water on and began to take my clothes off. 

I was counting on the fact that Even wasn’t going to this party. He’s the last person I wanna see at the moment. That’s a lie. I really wanna see him, I just don’t wanna deal with whatever is going on between us right now. 

The water was a little too hot but I didn’t fix it. I let it touch my skin and hoped that it would wash away all the drama in my life. 

Needless to say, it didn’t. 

 

* * *

 

The first person I saw when Noora and I walked in Jonas’ house was William. I looked down at the blonde head next to me and narrowed my eyes. 

“What?” She looked away. 

“I see you.” I said in a mocking tone. 

She grinned. 

“Oh shut up.” 

I rolled my eyes. She chuckled and walked towards the dark haired boy who was wearing a sweater that said “The Penetrators”. I couldn’t help but chuckle. That boy is a walking cliché. He does seem to be madly in love with Noora though, so I hope they end up together. 

Well, now I’m all alone. I looked around to see if I could find anyone familiar. 

“Isak! You came!” 

I heard Jonas’ voice coming from behind me. I turned around and smiled. 

“Hey!” I replied. 

Jonas’ threw his arms around me, making me lose my balance for a second. He looked pretty wasted already, which made me laugh. 

“Are you alright mate?” 

He grabbed my shoulders in order to balance himself. 

“Yep, just had a few drinks.” 

The words left his mouth abnormally slowly. 

“You can have whatever you want ok? I’ll just go say hello to Eva.”

I nodded while he turned around and walked away from me. I was standing in the middle of the living room. People were dancing around me but I wasn’t in the mood for it at the moment, so I decided to head to the kitchen. 

Magnus and Mahdi were having some kind of drinking competition. They both looked like they already had too much to drink. 

“Hey guys” I waved at them. 

They turn to me abruptly. Magnus opened a big smile. Mahdi threw his arms around me, just like Jonas did a few minutes ago. I laughed at them. 

“Why is everyone so drunk already?” I asked, pushing Mahdi away. 

Mahdi took a few steps towards the table, grabbed a beer bottle and handed it to me. 

“The real question is: why aren’t  _ you  _ drunk already?” 

They were gonna regret this tomorrow. I chuckled and grabbed the beer from his hand. I didn’t plan on getting drunk but, a beer certainly wouldn’t kill me. I decided to hang with the boys for a little bit. All my other friends seemed to be busy with their significant others anyway.  

The boys were always fun to have around. I watched them take shots, make stupid bets with each other and try to flirt with girls. They were rarely successful I have to say. 

Everything was going great when Magnus held his hand above his head and waved to someone behind me. I didn’t think much of it, it was probably just another cute girl that he was trying to make out with. But then I heard that stupid voice. 

“Hey guys!” 

I got goosebumps all over. I’d recognize his voice anywhere. I turned around. Even was standing right in front of me. Sonja was right next to him. My stomach felt funny. He greeted Magnus then Mahdi with hugs. When he got to me, he frowned his eyebrows. He looked like he didn’t know what to do. 

“Hi Even.” I decided to just go ahead and break the ice. 

He looked surprised. Sonja looked like she didn’t want to be there. 

“Hi” 

I hate this. I hate that everything is so awkward now. We’re suppose to be friends and have each others backs, not hate each other. My gaze traveled through his face. I miss him so very much. He looks sad. 

“Let’s go dance!” 

Sonja dragged him away before we could say anything else. Maybe it was better this way. The boys looked at me with curiosity. 

“What’s going on between you two?” Mahdi asked taking a sip from his cup. 

I frowned my eyebrows. 

“What are you talking about?” 

Magnus chuckled and placed a hand on my shoulder. 

“He’s talking about the way you and Even were eyefucking each other just now.” 

“ _ What?!  _ W-We weren’t… I don’t… I just…”

I couldn't come up with anything. 

“Dude just go talk to him, he obviously likes you too.” 

Mahdi pushed me in the direction of the living room. I got away from his hands and looked at them with a serious face. 

“You’re both being ridiculous. I don’t know what you’re talking about! And I’ll leave now because you’re annoying me!” 

They were quiet for a few seconds, then both began to laugh hysterically at my reaction. I rolled my eyes and walked away from them. 

The house was surprisingly not super crowded. Probably due to the fact that Jonas only told people about this party today. I could see him and Eva making out on one of the corners of the TV room. I proceed to the couch but, just as I was about to sit, Noora and William threw themselves on it and began to make out as well.  _ Great.  _ Well, I’m glad some of us are having a good time. 

I settled for the chair next to the couch and tried to ignore the couple next to me. I grabbed my phone and just scrolled through social media. 

“Isak!” Someone yelled over the music, making me look up.

Even was standing in front of me, alone. Our eyes met and my stomach decided to do backflips inside me. I swallowed and sustained his gaze. 

“What?” 

He was so handsome tonight. With his messy hair and big blue eyes.  _ Ugh.  _ I wish I didn’t like him so much. He seemed lost again. 

“I just… Can we talk?” 

My heart began to beat faster. I released my breath and looked up at him again. 

“Sure, go ahead.”

He avoided my gaze but I noticed that his eyes were brighter than usual. Was he about to cry?! Oh God no, I can’t handle that. I got up and touched his arm. 

“Hey... What’s wrong?” I asked softly.

Even looked down to meet my gaze. He seemed so sad, it broke my heart. 

“Do you wanna go outs-”

“EVEN! There you are!” 

Sonja showed up out of nowhere. She smiled at us. 

“I’ve been looking for you babe!” She sounded upset. 

_ Babe. _ Ouch. 

“Well, I’m gonna leave you guys alone.” 

I turned around and walked away, not waiting for a reply. I know Sonja never did anything wrong. She’s like, the nicest person in the world, but oh boy I hate her. I wish she would just disappear. 

The boys found me on my way to the kitchen and made me dance with them. I refused at first but they were very persistent. Without even realising, I would try to find Even with my eyes every once in a while. If they noticed, they never said anything. 

The third time my eyes landed on the blond boy my blood froze in my veins. He was making out Sonja. Well, to be honest it looked like Sonja was trying make out with him. But that didn’t make it any better, he was allowing it to happen. I wanted to throw up. I hate this so, so much. 

“How about you stop staring at them like a creep?” Mahdi giggled. 

I looked away from the couple and brought my eyes towards the boys. 

“I wasn’t-”

“Don’t even try. We know you.” Magnus stared at me with an unimpressed look on his face. 

I rolled my eyes. 

“Why don’t you go say hi to that boy over there who’s been staring at you all night?” 

Magnus pointed to somewhere on his right. I frowned my eyebrows but followed his finger.  _ Oh.  _ There was a boy, and he does seem to be staring at me. The dark haired guy smiled when he noticed me staring back. 

“Come on Isak, might as well have some fun tonight.” Mahdi stated.

The last thing I need right now is to bring someone else into my life’s drama. But a make out session never killed anyone. I smiled back and waved at the guy. If Even can have his fun, so can I. 

I walked up to him and began kissing his lips immediately. Not giving him the chance to say anything. That was my way of saying: This is just a kiss, I don’t even wanna know your name.

He seemed to be more than ok with it. The boy smiled and kissed me back right away. I gotta admit he’s a good kisser. For some unknown reason I decided to open my eyes in the middle of the kiss. I was surprised to find Even’s eyes on me. He looked angry. That made me want to kiss the random dude even more passionately. Why is  _ he  _ angry? He’s the one who keeps messing everything up! 

The guy pressed me against the wall and I kept sustaining Even’s gaze. That seemed to make Even even more mad. He then began to kiss Sonja while still staring at me. What the hell is happening? 

We kept doing this for at least five whole minutes. Then I suddenly felt weird. I mean, this is a really weird situation. Why are we doing this?

I told the guy I wasn’t feeling so good and walked away. This nonsense needs to stop. We can’t keep doing this. Whatever  _ this  _ is. I didn’t wanna be at the party anymore. I felt dirty for just using that boy. I’m not like this. I forced my legs to walk out of Jonas’ house. This whole situation is getting ridiculous.

As soon as I got outside I heard the police car approaching. 

“Shit, shit, shit.” 

I tried to hide myself in the bushes and stayed there for a whole minute. I knew it wouldn’t work for long. I tried to think of a way to leave without getting caught when someone screamed my name.

“Isak! Get in!” 

I turned around to find the owner of the voice. It was Jonas. He was driving his mom’s car and there were 3 more people inside it. I didn’t have time to see who they were, I just got in the back seat and closed the door. 

Jonas immediately started driving. I looked to the side trying to identify who was next to me. It was Mahdi and Even.  _ Even.  _ Oh no. Magnus was sitting on the passenger seat up front. 

“That was a close one.” Jonas said, distracting me. “I hope they don’t trash my house. Do you guys want me to drop you off.” 

We all confirmed. 

“Ok, I’ll start with Mahdi.” He stated quietly. 

“Yay!” Mahdy responded drunkenly.

I tried my best to ignore the fact that Even was right there. My heart was already beating really fast from running from the police, now it seemed like it was about to jump out of my chest. Even was looking out the window, not saying much. Maybe he hated this as much as I do. 

Jonas got to Mahdi’s apartment building pretty quickly, seeing it was just a few blocks away. I opened the car door and got up to let him go. The boy walked out and placed his hands on his knees. 

“Guys… I don’t feel very good.” 

He seemed like he was about to throw up. I looked away as he began to put out everything that he drank that night. 

“Ok, I’m gonna park and we’ll help you up buddy.” 

Jonas yelled from the driver’s seat. I closed the car door to let him go. He parked and walked out of the car, followed by Even and Magnus. 

“Come on, let’s go. You got this.” Jonas put his arm around Mahdi and helped him inside. The rest of us followed. 

I got the keys to the building from his back pocket and opened the front door. We all got in and proceeded to the elevator. 

“Oh shit, I forgot my jacket in your car!” Mahdi told us with his eyes closed and his head on Jonas’ shoulder. 

“I’ll go get in. Just give me the front door key. I’ll meet you guys up.” I offered

I didn’t want to be near Even anyway, that was my chance. Magnus took a silver key from the keychain and gave it to me. 

“Be right back.” I said while walking outside. 

The street smelled terrible because of Mahdi’s puke. I covered my nose with my shirt and tried not to breath a lot. His jacket was on the car floor behind the driver’s seat. I grabbed it began to walk back. I opened the door with the silver key and got in. For my surprise Even was still down there, waiting for the elevator. 

“I didn’t wanna be in the elevator in case he puked again.” He explained, looking at his feet. 

I nodded but didn’t say anything. The elevator showed up a few seconds later and we both got in. I avoided his gaze at all costs. The elevator closed its doors but didn’t move.

“I think we have to press a button in order for it to go.” 

Even said holding back a laugh. I couldn’t help but chuckle. 

“Oh right.” I smiled. 

I pressed the number 3 button and waited. Suddenly the light in the elevator went off. 

“What the hell?” I questioned. 

“Just give it a second.” Even responded. 

A second became 30, which became a minute, then two. The awkward silence between us was killing me.

“Do you think… the power went off?” 

I asked, too scared to hear the answer. 

“I’m afraid so…” 

Oh great. I’m stuck in an elevator with Even Bech fucking Næsheim. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaand that's it for today!  
> i know i'm a terrible person for cutting it there, sorry!! haha, i promise i'll be back soo though!  
> as always, please leave a comment if you enjoy this at all.  
> see you soon! <3


	7. Elevator Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak and Even finally communicate!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know i know i suck, i did not mean to take this long to update, i'm terrible.   
> i really am sorry. i hope you can still enjoy this lovely final chapter.  
> have fun! :)

I never really liked being in dark places. Even today, I sleep with a night light in my room. I know it sounds ridiculous, I’m almost 18 years old for God’s sake, but I just can’t help it. 

With that in mind, I can easily say that being stuck in a completely dark elevator was not a fun experience for me. Especially when Even Bech Næsheim is somewhere near. 

I could feel my breathing starting to get irregular. We’ve been stuck here for about ten minutes now. None of us saying much of anything. It’s _really_ dark and quiet in here. I guessed that Even was standing somewhere on the opposite corner, but I couldn’t actually see him. 

My mind decided to play tricks on me and I could’ve sworn I saw something creepy moving next to me. I decided to sit down and close my eyes. 

“What are you doing?” Even sounded confused. 

I tried to breathe slowly and hide the fact that I wasn’t feeling good. 

“Just sitting down” I replied. 

I heard him getting closer and sitting by my side.

“Are you still scared of the dark?” He asked me softly.  Sounding a bit worried. 

_ Damn it.  _ Why does he have to know me so well?

“Maybe”. 

I knew there was no point in denying it. I felt him getting closer to me, his arm lightly touching mine. My breathing got even heavier. He hurt me so much, but I miss the bastard like crazy. 

He cleared his throat. 

“I’m gonna put my arm around you now, ok?” 

His voice was so sweet, it made me want to cry. 

“You don’t have to, I’m alright” I lied. 

Even chuckled. 

“Did you forget who you’re talking to?” 

He asked in the middle of a giggle. I was ready to ask him to leave me alone when I felt his arms around my shoulders. When Even was this close to me, it was really,  _ really  _ hard to be mad at him. 

“Better?” he asked in a whisper. 

I suddenly got goosebumps all over. Even ran his fingers up and down my right arm. My whole body felt like it was on fire. Before I could help myself, I rested my face on his shoulder, which made him hold on to me even tighter. Oh God this is bad, I’m suppose to be mad at him, but right now, I just wanna look up and kiss him. 

We stayed like this for at least five whole minutes. My breathing and heartbeat went back to normal and I wasn’t so scared anymore. I was starting to wonder where the hell the boys were. Were they just not gonna look for us? 

Before I could vocalize my thoughts, Even slightly moved next to me, bringing me back to reality. 

“Isak I think we need to talk about a few things…” 

My blood went cold in my veins. I really don’t wanna get my feelings hurt right now. 

“Look Even, let’s not do this right now ok?” I said, moving away from him. 

The blond boy got close to me again. He took a deep breath. I couldn’t really see him but I knew he looked worried. 

“I love you Isak” Even said very quickly, as if it was something he shouldn’t be saying. 

I shot my gaze up towards his face, even though I couldn’t see it. My heart was beating like crazy again. Did he just…? My mouth opened and closed twice before I was able to form a sentence. 

“You do?” Was what I was able to come up with. 

Even chuckled, but it sounded like he was about to cry. He turned so he could face me and held both of my hands. 

“ _ Yes _ . I really, really do. With all of my heart”. 

My head was spinning. But that didn’t make sense! 

“But you’ve been acting so weird! With your Instagram posts, and Sonja! This makes no sense Even!” I cried. 

The blond boy held my hands even tighter, as if he was scared I was gonna disappear.

“Oh Isak, everything has been so confusing. Sonja has been telling me you don’t like me like that and that I should move on. And she told me to post that stupid picture. But I’m tired, I’m tired of pretending I don’t like you as more than a friend because I do! I love you, I’ll say it a thousand times if I need to. I love you Goddammit!” 

I felt like all the air in world was gone. Did he really just say all that? Am I dreaming? I’ve been wanting to hear this for so long. I didn’t know how to respond. I placed my left hand on his face, and before I could even think about what I was doing, I kissed him. I kissed him like our lives depended on it. Even didn’t need to be told twice. He hugged me so close, it was hard to know where my body ended and his began. 

When the kiss was over, we stayed in the embrace. We didn’t want this moment to be over. 

“Do you think you feel the same way about me? I mean, understand if you don’t, it’s not like it’s your fault and—” 

I covered his lips with a kiss so he would stop talking. He giggled. 

“I always have and always will love you Even Bech Næsheim.”

It was the truest sentence I had ever spoken in my life. The feeling has always been there, even when I wasn’t aware of it. Even is my sunshine, my happy days, my best laughs. How can I not love him when he is the definition of love?

He held me closer to his chest and placed his head on my shoulder. I slowly ran my hand through his hair. I could stay like this forever. I wasn’t even bothered by the darkness anymore. 

As we all know, good things usually don’t last very long. So, before we could get too comfortable, the elevator lights came back on, blinding me for a couple of seconds. 

“Oh gosh, that’s bright” Even complained. 

We blinked a few times until our eyes got used to the new light. The first thing I noticed when I looked at him was that his face had tears all over it. It broke my heart to see him like this. 

“Ok, we need to establish a communication rule if we’re going to do this. Whatever  _ this  _ is. Because I feel like all of this suffering could have been avoided if we had talked to each other earlier” I stated honestly. 

The elevator started to move up. Even chuckled and nodded. 

“Yes sir. Communication is our new number one rule” he said in the middle of a laugh. 

When we got out of the elevator and walked in Mahdi’s apartment we understood why no one came looking for us. Magnus was lying on the living room’s floor, Jonas was fast asleep on the couch and Mahdi was snoring in his room. 

“Well, at least they’re all alive” I giggled. 

I walked to the kitchen, looking for a glass of water. Even followed me. 

“Do you wanna catch the bus home?” 

I nodded, avoiding his eyes. 

“So, do you… Um, do you m-maybe want to spend the night at my apartment?” 

My face was burning, I knew I was red all over. 

“Isak Valtersen, are you implying that you want to sleep with me?!” He asked very loudly and with a big grin on his face.

“Oh my God, I hate you” I rolled my eyes. But the smile didn’t seem to want to leave my lips.  

* * *

 

We talked all the way to the bus stop and the bus ride. He explained everything that happened between him and Sonja and how she made him believe I didn’t have feelings for him. I ended up getting really mad and sending her a nasty text. I don’t regret one bit. She deserves it. 

She also got a text from Even, who was also very upset, now that he heard my side of the story. His text told her to leave us alone and never talk to him again. If this was a different situation, I might have felt sorry for her. But what she did was just mean manipulation. I’m sure karma is coming for her. 

Having Even with me, being able to hold his hand all the way home and know that he loves me the same way I love him, shows me that everything was worth it. I would do it all over again if it meant we would end up exactly where we are. In each other’s arms. 

 

* * *

 

I woke up the next morning with Noora yelling at me. 

“What does this mean Isak?! What happened and why did you not tell me?!” She demanded while sitting on my bed. 

I blinked a few times trying to understand what was happening. The first thing I noticed was that Even wasn’t next to me on the bed. I tried not to freak out too much about it. Last night wasn’t a dream, right?

“What the hell are you talking about?” I asked in a raspy voice. 

The blonde rolled her eyes and showed me her cell phone. 

 

[ ](https://ibb.co/ek8VGd)

 

I couldn’t help but smile. 

“Oh my God it’s true isn’t it?”

I shrugged my shoulders and tried to look innocent. 

“Is that why he’s in our kitchen cooking breakfast?! Isak you have to tell me what the hell happened!” She yelled. 

I laughed but she looked irritated. Noora pushed my shoulder and chuckled. 

“Ok get up, I need to hear the whole story” the blonde demanded. 

I felt my face heating up. 

“Sure, I just… I need to, um, get dressed…” I avoided her eyes. 

“Oh my God, you’re naked! This just got so much better!” She laughed. 

I rolled my eyes and pushed her away. 

“Leave! Or I won’t tell you anything!” I threatened her. 

Noora giggled again and looked at me with a grin. 

“Ok! But hurry up!” 

She left the room jumping in excitement. I rolled my eyes again but laughed when she was gone. When I was done getting dressed, I walked to the kitchen and what I found there seemed like it came straight from one of my dreams. 

Even was on the stove flipping a pancake and adding in to a plate. He had one of my oversized shirts on and  messy bed hair that looked just beautiful on him. He turned around to place the plate on the table and caught me standing at the door. The blond boy gave me his biggest smile, walked up to me, placed a hand on my waist and kissed me lightly on the lips. As if we did this every morning. 

“Good morning” he said to my ear. 

“Morning” I replied shyly still trying to take everything in. 

Is this the new normal? Oh God, I really hope so. 

I was so focused on Even that I didn’t even noticed Noora sitting on one of the chairs. 

“Ok, this is the cutest shit I have ever seen in my whole life” she stated. 

I laughed and Even joined me. 

“Good morning to you too Noora” I replied, shooting my eyebrows up. 

* * *

 

The three of us ate breakfast together. Noora wasn’t satisfied until we told her every single detail of the story, even though we only discovered the whole story ourselves a few hours ago. By the end of it the girl decided she disliked Sonja with all of her heart. I can’t say I don’t feel the same way. 

When she left to hang out with Eva, we ended up with the place to ourselves. It was the first time I felt like we were a real couple and everything was going to be alright. Since this whole Even drama began, the both of us had been walking in circles, always making the same mistakes, which ended up with us getting hurt and away from each other. Now we finally broke the cycle. We can give each other the love that we deserve and no one gave us before. We can give each other kisses and hold hands in public. We can be Isak and Even.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaand that's a wrap. thank you so so much for every one who read this.  
> I really hope you guys like the ending, i wanted it to be full of fluff.  
> please let me know what you think in the comments.   
> alt er love <3


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